i've been like sick since valentine's...super tired and sian now.. finally i tmr half day, or else i will just have mental breakdown lar... not forgting this fri i have bio SPA test...i'm so not ready and sim wants to give me a bench seat...its very difficult to work dere lor...so pissed off.. until now my nose is still running and i have loads of stuff to...and my chinese mid-year is next week mon...argghh! so shit...then tmr i still have tutition...ahhh so tired... i'm just super lei...i think i'm going to slp now..then wake up later to do my work..stress..stress... nights!`

today after school and cca i came back home..and then went for a wake[some complicated relationship with the deceased]. when i gt there and went thru the procedure , it reminded me of the sad memories i had when my grand ma passed away. i remember last year i was at moe exhibition being like a spokesperson of the sch...then jie kept calling me but i refused to answer thinking its not important. till the 3rd call she made i went behind the boards and answered the call...she sounded like she was crying...she said' grandma stopped breathing we are rushing home now..can u make it!!' i was super shocked frighten and just speechless..all i could think was to cab home immediately... i left yiggie to do the job and rushed out to grab a cab....super bad, luck no cab..finally i gt 1 and rushed home.. this was the tragic moment i rushed in to my grandma's rm seeing her lying there and my aunt and cousins cryin at the side, i just couldn't stop my tears from rolling...i couldn't believe and kept asking my sis the same ques ' is it over...isit..is she dead alrdy...' i was really troubled then. after tat we started preparing for the funeral...i was quite down..but jie and my cousins were there to cheer me up.. i regretted so much..i didn't greet her every morning, didn't took time to spend time with her, and when she left, i regret it.. am i an idiot or wad... i miss her so much`=(

super shit lar... i tot i had finished all my hw and could just do my emaths like just now after mass but no...i still had ss...so crap! tats why i'm still here blogging. but tats not bad enough while doin ss sbq, inference i actually inferred the wrong source...so dumd larx...super sad now. i have to redo tat ques and hopefully with the correct source feeling quite sian after doin ss..then i still left with ss evaluating answer which doesn't realli makes sense but i can't be bothered anymore.. i have not much time i still have emaths[lots of ques lar] to rush thru! so hoped someone could help me now...i'm super stuck with emaths and evaluating lar...so shit! I'M ALRDY TOTALLY SHAGGED OUT! then tmr still have cca and tues have rehearsal for cny celebration, wed have the jap meiko students coming down, thurs have learning journey, fri...heys i'm quite free...haha...but i've yet to buy my cny clothes and the wonderful sis of mine has alrdy bought hers without asking me out and like i guess everyone has bought theirs alrdy... hopefully i can find someone willing to go out with me this fri for some shopping.. valentine's day is coming and as usual i'm all alone...even my sis has plans..but its alright! i'll find stuff to do...sadly~ maybe i can do hw and do some surfing to pass my time or go tm shop for cny clothes..haha great idea! i guess valentine's would be like every year spent will family...like wad dad would say' spending quality time with family' how inspirational can tat be....haha to everyone out there who has dates, have a wonderful valentine's with ur patner. and for those single ones u can either celebrate with ur family...or give me a ring...haha happy valentine's!<3

our happiness and misery is actually within our control. its whether we make the best out of everything we do or just show no signs of interest at all. its all up to us... don't make ur life sound as if its the end of the world that u are the most unlucky or misfortunate kid..but have u ever considered abt the little kids in africa who aren't as fortunate as u to have a roof over ur head and a family.. family is ur most and onli ppl u can trust... even thoughu may have friends but they sometimes become ur enemires and betray u` family sticks by u forever and always encourage u...u may not see it sometimes..but yes their love is portrated in different ways...just always remember to appreciate it...don't lose the kin then start appreciating...it would be too late. cherish wad u have; ur loved ones, ur life and live it to the fullest and don't ever give up easily perservere and achievements would arise. do u best in everything and always remember always be positive...

ahhh...its come to the time of the year where syf is stressing everyone out... wads more there's still council work for me...feeling quite tired..but no worries i'll perservere until i step down frm office. today cca was actually veri fun though we had abt 5hrs of co cause finally after so long mr ben boo came..missed his lessons so much!! but sadly the teacher's dun allow him to teach us and anyway he's busy with his NAFA studies..we were practising real hard in the begining and before cca actually ended we were like telling lame jokes and about the movie bruce almighty!...super corny me.. gt lots of hw this weekend...even when some teacher's noe tat we had camp today and tmr they still piled up their subject hw...so pissed off` today is alos the day my seniors gt their some happi some sad moments..O"LEVEL results...haha some were crying badly for sadness, disappoint and yet some were tears of joy.. yet after watching their reactions i started to be afraid how it would look like when i collect my results would i be tearing for joy or disappoint..=( i've been busy lately thats why frm now on i shld onli be able to blog twice a month..sad right i noe...i also veri 'she bu de' sad sad... i'm going to have an early night today..tmr i need to be in sch lastest 8am lar...and i wil be spending abt 1/2 my day there...i veri sad i'm missing con class.. cause +this week i'll be missing 2 lessons...and i was because i was sick and the other for syf...realli sacred tat i can't get confirmed...realli looking for it though~ so disappointing=(